The homily today was that of a wedding and the groomsmen dressing like the groom. It was about being Holy regardless of the circumstances whether rich or poor, or facing good times or trials.
Some look at me today and tell me that I eat too much or I need to exercise more. My mother schools me on diet like some kind of authority and my doctor who has seen me gain the weight begging for help to figure out what is going on now acts like I have always been fat all I need to do is cut my 1800 calorie diet in half to lose weight.... Not that he seems to care that I track my calories and that is a pretty average day of food for this was 210 lb 2 time Full Ironman racer now 270 lbs struggling to run 5 miles.
I bounce back and forth from wanting desperately to be a better weight for God to thinking that I have gained this weight for a reason to this is a challenge that I must overcome. The consensus from the world though appears to be that I have utterly failed as a human being. Today I ask myself what dressing righteously looks like when everyone seems to think that I overindulge by looking at me.
Remembering the time I once did great things in hopes of doing great things again and in prayer for increased fortitude.
