I'm a baptized Protestant who is coming back to faith and I'm recently drawn heavily towards catholicism. I'm currently going through rough times. I'm married to a Hindu woman. I was in love with her for over 2 years before getting married to her in Nov 2025. We married in both Hindu and Christian cultures. I'm a terrible person and I have cheated on her multiple times with multiple people before and after marriage. I have committed grave sins behind her back and I can't even speak of them to anyone. I've cried and repented to God to forgive and it's difficult to completely get rid of all the thoughts. I'm planning for a confession with priest soon and I'm scared to disclose all these to her. It'll break her heart and shatter her. I can't even face her. I can't even stay and sleep properly because of this. And regarding the confession, it'll be the first confession in 30 years and I've committed countless grave sins and I regret all of them. I realized I was in the dark and drowning in sin without realising the damage I'm doing to myself and Christ. I'm worried about my marriage and my wife when she gets to know all the things I've done, I pray God prepares her for my disclosure to her. I genuinely love her and I'm the person who's going to shatter her with all this. Also, I'm trying really hard to get over bad thoughts and old ways that are obstructing me from full repentence. I don't know what willy life look like. I want a fresh start and I want a new chance at life from God and my wife. If anyone's been in a similar situation, what did you do? What was the aftermath? Please share any advice
God please help me
Please pray for me 🙏
Anonymous Drake
September 4, 2026
I cheated on my wife multiple times and I've committed multiple grave sins. Feeling lost in life.
14 comments
14 Comments
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@ridimapinto26Sep 4I heard this on a catholic podcast - Once you confess your sins, you don't need to disclose them to anyone. It would have to be a burden you carry alone. Hope that helps.
Anonymous DrakeSep 5
Thanks for responding, Ridhima. I went through a couple youtube videos and they said that I must disclose it to the partner. I'm not sure what the conditions are for that. I'm confused and trying to learn. It would be great if you can share the podcast link.
@ridimapinto26Sep 5It's one of the Avoiding babylon podcasts. I can't recall which one. It was a conversation they were having in an unrelated podcast. You should also consult with your confessor about this. As far as I know, you don't need to disclose confessed sins. If God has wiped away our sins, it makes sense to put the whole burden of that sin on someone else. Start saying the rosary if you're not already saying it. Start saying all 20 mysteries. Our Lady will show you the right way and save your marriage.
@gabrielstcharlesSep 4This is really difficult. If my partner cheated on me, I’d like to know the truth, however that said, unless there’s an actual reason that they could find out about it, I’ve learnt that you should not disclose it. I used to disagree with this because I think truth matters, but the amount of psychological harm it puts someone through to find out something like that will destroy them. Someone explained it to me that wanting to “confess” to your partner is more for yourself than for them. It is in fact your burden and consequence to have to have that weigh on you for the rest of your life. Especially if you have children, disclosing this could destroy your family. This is of course only applicable only if you have actually repented and are certain that you will NEVER do this again. A good reason to disclose to your wife is if you actually think you can’t stop, and have decided to leave the relationship.
@misericordiaSep 4Such a hard situation that you're in. First, I want to say I admire your courage to get back up and go to confession. Every one of us is in sin - though some more grave - but many people don't have the humility and courage to do something about it.
About if you should tell your wife or not: you should ask that to your priest. However, I do think it's important in a relationship that you are honest, as she deserves. Personally, I would feel more betrayed if my partner sinned against me and didn't repent and tell, than if he sinned but repented and got honest about it afterwards. But you must still prepare for that if you tell her, it will be a very hard conversation and it will be a damage on her trust and your relationship together. It wouldn't be realistic for yourself to expect otherwise.
Either way, you'll want to pray for her that God prepares her and make reparations in some way, do little mortifications for it too. I will keep you and your wife in my prayers for sure! 🙏
About if you should tell your wife or not: you should ask that to your priest. However, I do think it's important in a relationship that you are honest, as she deserves. Personally, I would feel more betrayed if my partner sinned against me and didn't repent and tell, than if he sinned but repented and got honest about it afterwards. But you must still prepare for that if you tell her, it will be a very hard conversation and it will be a damage on her trust and your relationship together. It wouldn't be realistic for yourself to expect otherwise.
Either way, you'll want to pray for her that God prepares her and make reparations in some way, do little mortifications for it too. I will keep you and your wife in my prayers for sure! 🙏
@christinaSep 5I know this is a very heavy burden to carry & it takes courage to be this honest about it here. I’ll definitely keep you in my prayers, that God gives you the courage & strength to make the right decisions moving forward. As a fellow Catholic, I would strongly encourage you to speak to a priest & make an honest Confession before making any major decisions. If you are truly repentant and make a sincere Confession, trust in God’s mercy. At the same time, I really think you need to consider your wife’s perspective too. Put yourself in her place if you found out years later that your spouse had hidden all of this from you, how would that feel? I think she deserves the truth and the chance to decide what she wants for her own life and marriage & I’d also ask yourself honestly: do you truly want to build a faithful life with her and change, or are you holding on because you’re afraid of life without her? Whatever happens may be difficult but she deserves to have a say in this.
Anonymous DrakeSep 5
Thanks for the response Christina. I definitely want to build a faithful life with her. I'm scared to death to reveal the details thinking of the impact it would have on her. I'm just praying to God to give her strength to handle what I'll be saying. I'm unable to live a normal life now. I'm praying to Christ to please be there with me and forgive my sins. I want a second chance at life. I don't what my priest would say at this point. But I feel the marriage is already over, it's just a matter of time. I want her to be safe and loved. I'm the wrong choice for her.
@christinaSep 5Don’t worry. God already knows what’s in your heart and sees your repentance. Mama Mary and Jesus will guide you through the next steps. I’d really encourage you to involve a priest in this as well, it could be incredibly helpful, both for you personally and as you discern together what to do next in your marriage. Their prayers and guidance will be a source of strength.
@christinaSep 5Please don’t lose hope. God’s mercy is greater than the mistakes you’ve made.
@krzysztof_2Sep 5No sinner is too far gone for God's mercy, but you need to go to confession and do reparations for your sins. I implore you to read St. Faustyna's Diary and pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet. Check this link out for Jesus' promises related to praying this Chaplet and how to pray it:
https://www.sthelenvero.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Divine-Mercy-Chaplet-Promises.pdf
For example, "When hardened sinners say it, I will fill their souls with peace, and the
hour of their death will be a happy one. (Diary, 1541)"
https://www.sthelenvero.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Divine-Mercy-Chaplet-Promises.pdf
For example, "When hardened sinners say it, I will fill their souls with peace, and the
hour of their death will be a happy one. (Diary, 1541)"
Anonymous DrakeSep 5
Thanks for sharing. Will check this.
@carsmythSep 5I am sorry if this felt like a battle for you! You are finding your way back to the church. Confess it to the priest. Prepare yourself, ask the Holy Spirit to reveal your wrongs and confess them with true repentance.
I would definitely, rather the thought that's comes to mind is that you have to go for a retreat. Either a 2 day minimum retreat. The novena of our Lady of Health is going on. She is always at our side waiting for us to ask her to help us.
Ask your guardian angel to pray for you. Attend Mass frequently in the week. See that you spend time in the Blessed sacrament. And take praise and worship. Take her if you can also. Go for a couples retreat. Renew yourself in Christ. Don't let fear stop you from confessing. I am not saying you give up on your marriage. But see a charismatic priest and instead go to them also for confession. I tell you the church will help you to renew your marriage vows and come back to church and bring her completely into Christ.
I would definitely, rather the thought that's comes to mind is that you have to go for a retreat. Either a 2 day minimum retreat. The novena of our Lady of Health is going on. She is always at our side waiting for us to ask her to help us.
Ask your guardian angel to pray for you. Attend Mass frequently in the week. See that you spend time in the Blessed sacrament. And take praise and worship. Take her if you can also. Go for a couples retreat. Renew yourself in Christ. Don't let fear stop you from confessing. I am not saying you give up on your marriage. But see a charismatic priest and instead go to them also for confession. I tell you the church will help you to renew your marriage vows and come back to church and bring her completely into Christ.
@garfieldSep 6You're on the right track brother and the Lord must be working through you for you to feel this level of conviction and a want for repentance.
I dont have advice for you but keep fighting, keep chasing after God. Have courage and endure.
It is better to repent and to suffer the consequences of your sins in this life than the next. You cannot hide this from your wife.
Stay strong brother and utilize the courage God has given you.
I wish i had advice but i would hope a Priest in the church can guide you.
I dont have advice for you but keep fighting, keep chasing after God. Have courage and endure.
It is better to repent and to suffer the consequences of your sins in this life than the next. You cannot hide this from your wife.
Stay strong brother and utilize the courage God has given you.
I wish i had advice but i would hope a Priest in the church can guide you.
@jpgarcia7787Sep 9Convert. You'll learn a lot. I recommend "Magisterium AI" app
